The new year approaches as December has always anticipated, and people, we all, embrace for change.
Millions upon millions of resolutions are being prepared world-wide to be set afloat by champagne bubbles rising from clanking toasts, heading high with the hopes of
being fulfilled.
However, the prelude can be pensive.
December dawns in darkness, driven by winds that determined, cannot be stopped at delivering the next page...
I call this poem December
(written December 10th, 06)
I spend many hours alone in my room,
enclosed in this room.
with nobody else, i have only myself,
or at least I can have what is left.
But sometimes I love it, But sometimes I HATE
and then there are times when I cry.
How deeply I cry...
I wish I would die, how lovely to die
and this room would be empty inside!
...but then when I'm through
with my dry
swollen eyes
I feel such a drive, such a wonderful drive,
and I smile that I'm still alive.
I could conquer the world at those times.
What a strong little girl at those times.
And I open my door,
always ready for more at those times.
So I open my eyes, then I open them wide
to see that the world is so vast.
I see that its spinning so fast!
The world spins around me,
so quickly around me
I wonder where it will go...
but with so many people
running by other people
I don't think that anyone knows.
Does it matter where all of this goes?
So now I'm running again, to keep up with the world
and I can't stop to look at its faces.
We're all going at different paces
each of us running our races
too busy to care about faces.
So if somebody stops, if somebody drops
the world will go on just as fast
and the ones who stop become part of the past
assuming, they were part of the present.
We run to stay warm, I think as I run, to stay warm in a world that seems colder.
But maybe the world is always the same and it's I whose only grown older...
with many more years up ahead.
So young and so old as I run with the world
sometimes I forget that I'm only a girl;
a girl among many about to be ready,
have I started running too soon?
And now I'm running with all of this weight on my head.
And I'm falling behind in this world full of races
I just want to go back to bed
I'd run all the way backwards, to be in my room again.
But, halfway to the ground, as I'm falling behind
I, once again find the will to survive.
It was not in my room nor the world, of all places,
I found my own will buried deeply inside,
kept safely away from the world and its races.
The will to survive keeps me alive,
and makes it okay to close both my eyes.
No, I'm not blind, I'm just looking inside
where everything was from the start.
I had it all in my own heart.
And I don't have to run, not to nor away.
What I want is life from each day.
I love everyday.
Beauty is ugly as gold attracts thieves
but nothing's more simple than this.
Nightmares are still someone's dreams.
True that world spins, too quickly for some,
but now I can laugh at us trying to run. :)
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inspiration for 2012
